Monday, October 02, 2006
1st October
This day is actually the birthday of my best friend Hwalong, and i want to write about him today. If u have time.. read on.
Still remember the days in Telok Kurau Secondary, where this bunch of irritating boys will come n irritate the whole class and disturb the girls. Of coz, they are the big bullies of the class, clowns as well. No one can be louder or more irritating then them. Hwalong is just one of them.
I did not really talk to them coz they were really quite annoying and very action. recalling the koropok hairstyle, long sideburn, long wallet plus point comb at the back pocket. - that was the fashion then... and many girls were head over heels for them.
over years, I dont know why, Hwalong and I became very very good friends despite him being very irritating and likes to make fun of me. I feel very comfortable talking to him... its amazing how he is always so patient and understanding. we gradually became SUPER good friend. - nothing more then that, though many assumed that we were an item.
yeah! sec 2 exams over!! but he told us that his parents wanst to transfer him to other school. there was nothing that could stop that from happening, we were all sad. he is the joy of the class u know? the one that will encourage the class, the one that will bring laughters to our lives (tears to some)... we all kept silent. and even throughout the dec holidays. i could rem asking him times n times again, "can u not go to other school?"...
He wasn't with us during sec 3 n 4, but he came back often to visit us, catch up etc... however, we call each other lesser and lesser... until finally no more calls from each other... we were both busy with our own friends and schedule... but deep within, we know that we have a best friend. A friend that will be there when anything happens, a friend that will talk to me till wee hours when i am troubled.. a friend that will care.
we lost touch.
O levels past so swiftly that i didn't even notice.
One day, I was shopping with Cynthia at Plaza Singapura, someone shouted from behind "TAY KAIYUN!" I was startled. The familiar voice almost immediately matched the face that I saw. It was him. It was a pleasant surprise even though i really dun like people to shout my name that loudly. Together with him was Yaojin and Hanliang. The 5 of us went to a nearby coffee place and chatted till wee hours. That was a happy night. That night... we started to exchange calls again. Catching up on all the things that has happened etc...
From that day, Hwalong, Hanliang, YaoJin and I met up almost every night, Cynthia will join us when she's free. Thrice a week, the 3 guys will come to my coffeeshop after their gym session, and my mum will cook 15 eggs for them. (they believe that they must eat 5 egg white after gym... i dunno why!) And we will hang out, play pool, watch movie and go home at 3am everyday. We call ourselves the 3am Gang. and that also explains why i'm quite an expert in pool.. i play everyday leh... hahaa..
and yes, the 3am Gang goes out everyday. do crazy stuffs... eg. help Yaojin buy a ultra huge spoon to chase girl, queue at 7am for free nokia servicing, crazy over memo-jazz pagers and many more... those were the days. the 6 mths holidays... one of the happiest moment in my life.
the 3 of us became un-separable... but one day. Hwalong confessed of something he did which hurt me alot, and i was really furious with him. I never spoke to him ever since.
For about 6mths, I did not talk to him, did not reply his pager messages (that time still using pager). even there's once where Yaojin n Hanliang wanted to meet me for dinner, they appeared with him, i went home right away. I know they want to help to reconcile the realtionship but i told them off instead. and i said. "I really cant forgice him and don't want to see him"
Months past till Valentines' Day 2001. He called me and said he wanted to pass me something. I refused to meet him. He went to my house, hopping that my brother will be at home. too bad, no one at home. he finally got to know that i am meeting my frens at cityhall.. and when i reach cityhall, i was extremely surprised to see him with a big bouquet of flowers. he walked towards me, and said 'happy valentines'. I did nothing, almost turned and walk away. (very heartless). he persisted and i could see the desperation in through his eyes. I took the flowers and said thank you. he knows i had plans with my frens so he left.
That night, he called. We chatted and he ask me to forgive him. I said "No". But actually i lready forgave him, it has already been so long... and he already learnt his mistake.. I'm just "zui ying".. i know that all these months, the 3am Gang has been trying their best to see us back on talking terms... and that night, I really really really really.. forgive him. (i just nv tell him)
1 week later, I receive a call from hanliang at 3am. "hello kaiyun, hwalong was hit by a bus"... i replied "ok... we'll go n see him the first thing in the morning. its 3am now"
7am the next day,
Hanliang: "err...err.. kaiyun, he is gone"
Kaiyun: "U siao ah!! early morning make this kind of joke to wake me up"
Hanliang: "I am serious, he is gone, he did not make it..."
He left...
He's gone...
He did not know that i already forgive him...
He did not hear me say that I cherish him as a friend..
Yaojin scolded me...
I will not get a 2nd chance...
I could not forgive myself...
I could not accept it...
I could not sleep nor eat...
I cry myself to bed everynight, my family was so worried...
I just wanted to say... "I am sorry!"
"are you kaiyun?" his sister asked. "so, you are the one that hwalong work very hard for, just to buy a bouquet of flowers on valentine day." she continued.. "do u know why hwalong work so hard during the holidays taking on 2 jobs? to have money to go out with u all... "
I was speechless.. but tears just flowed. little did i know that he did so much for me, for us..
I will never forget this friend, even though he is not with PapaGod. I wanna trust God for his family. I know that no one can ever fill the gap in the family which he brought so much joy to... except Papa God.
Now the 3am Gang sorta disband...
The 3 of us seldom meet up...
The last time i saw them was at Imelda's birthday.
I really hope that one day, the 3am Gang will come together again.
Yaojin and Hanliang - Thank you for planting beautiful memories into my life, it was something that will stay with me forever. That i once has a wonderful bunch of friends...
Hwalong - you are never forgotten...
U all may be wondering why am I sharing such deep feelings n thoughts in this blog.. I just hope that all of u will learn a lesson from my life, and cherish everyone around you. U may never know when they will leave you. Live each day as if its the last day. Forgive all, love all.. I also hope that u all dun make the same mistakes as i do.. coz there is no room for regrets...
God bless you all...
1st October